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Washington Is Horny! Government Shuts Down, Porn Sites Go Up

Ready for your daily dose of hilariousness? Orgasm News conducted a study on the effects Washington’s shut-down had on the porn industry, and the results were nothing short of amazing.

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According to their study, traffic on porn sites increased by 30.12% once the government workers were sent home, and traffic to dating site ads on porn sites had an increase of nearly 50% during that time. That’s a lot of people in Washington getting their self love on during the shut down!

No wonder there have been so many sex scandals in Washington over the last few years- Their employees are a bunch of horndogs!

Do you watch more porn when you’re on vacation?

Porn Vs. Sex: Why You Need To Lower Your Expectations

 

There’s no need to lie here: We’ve all done it. We’ve all watched porn, expected our sex lives to be as amazing and exciting as it is, and came down with a crushing disappointment when we finally realized sex is nothing like it is in the movies.

So what is the difference between porn and reality? What are the sizes? The expectations? The willingness to get kinky?

The KB Creative Lab decided to measure up the differences (literally!) between our expectations that porn has given us and what sex in the real world is actually like.

Check out the video and tell us if you’ve had some of these misconceptions yourself!

 

Let’s Get Personal! How Do You Masturbate?

large1 Lets Get Personal! How Do You Masturbate?

Let’s face it: There are some nights we simply don’t have time to hookup with people. But that doesn’t mean you want to miss out on a great orgasm! When you want to climax without the hassle of calling up your friend with benefits, then it’s time to take things into your own hands– Literally.

We decided to ask a few of our members how they enjoy their alone time, and a few of the answers might surprise you!

“I’m old fashioned. Give me some lotion, some Kleenex, and a Playboy. I’ve been using this method since I was a kid! Hey if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
-Dazed4Dayz, 32, Dallas

“I like to talk dirty with people online while I masturbate. Other people are still getting me off, I’m just doing a little more of the hard work!”
-Sabastian4484, 29, Minneapolis  More…

Five Things You Absolutely, Positively MUST Do In Bed Tonight!

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It’s June 4th. The summer has officially started and although the weather may not reflect it, it’s time to heat things up! We know that it’s still early in the week, so we won’t overload you with too much boring text.

We’re just going to get straight into it: Here are the five things you absolutely, positively, must do in bed tonight!

Break out the good underwear!

It’s shocking the difference a nice pair of panties can make when compared to your everyday briefs. Not only will you feel sexier, but it’s been proven that men are naturally more sexually aroused when they have a visual stimulator like good underwear.

Make the moans, not the screams

Moaning and groaning is a great stimulator in bed, but when you try to go full porn-star with your noises, it becomes a big turn-off. Keep your moaning to a minimum and keep them turned on! More…

Three Reasons To Embrace Your Curves In Bed

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Let’s face it: For most women in America, the thinner they are, the better they feel about themselves. Between constantly seeing new-generation sex symbols as stick-thin women and having only a handful of popular ‘overweight’ celebrities showcased in movies and television shows, it’s no wonder that women of today have a complex that leaves them feeling frumpy when fat.

But we have good news for women carrying a few extra pounds: Men don’t only mind when you’re carrying a little junk in the trunk– They prefer it!

In a scientific study conducted by Men’s Health Magazine (and we’re using the term ‘scientific‘ loosely here), a group of 80 men were shown three photos of women wearing the same outfits with both the same hairstyles and makeup– One of a women considered underweight by the Body Mass Index, one considered to be in the healthy BMI weight range, and one considered overweight. Of the 80 men, less than 5% of them choose the underweight woman as the most attractive. 42% of them chose the woman of healthy weight, but a surprising 53% of men said that the woman above the healthy BMI range was the sexiest.

Instead of covering your curves, start to flaunt them! Here are three reasons our Sexperts think you should get the most bang for your belly:

  1. You’ll be a more desired wife
    Since the dawn of time men have been subconsciously choosing wives based on the size of their hips– and the bigger is the better! Bigger hips and thighs are linked to fertility and overall health, which evolution has proved to be a big attraction factor for men seeking a life-long mate. More…

Gwyneth Paltrow Is Trying To Get You Laid

Screen shot 2012 02 13 at 12.55.06 PM Gwyneth Paltrow Is Trying To Get You Laid

Gwyneth Paltrow is a pretty busy woman. She’s an Academy Award winner, a mother, the newly titled sexiest woman in the world, star of Iron Man 3 (which is opening this weekend!), a wife to one of the busiest guys in the music industry Chris Martin, and an active blogger. Now she’s adding one more thing to her list of accomplishments: Pimp.

Alright, maybe ‘pimp’ is an exaggeration. Is she standing on the street corner hailing down guys looking to have a good time? No. But she is going out of her way to try and get you laid!

If you’re a subscriber to Paltrow’s weekly e-mail, GOOP, there’s no doubt that you’re familiar with her usual banter: Pictures of her life to motivate you via jealousy, recipes to keep you skinny (because we all know she hates fat people), and tips on the next-best thing in the fashion industry. But the actress herself claims that this week’s e-mail isn’t for you, “It’s for your other half.”

If you’re looking to get laid tomorrow, Gwennie has a few tips to jump-start your weekend sex success!

More…

Spring Has Sprung– And So Has Your Sex Drive

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Top sexual research experts at Harvard University, The University of California, Miami State University along with multiple other prominent research facilities have found undeniable signs that both singles and people in relationships have a significantly lower amount of sex than they do during the rest of the year. So naturally with the dawning of spring comes the reawakening of your long lost libido! If you’re a little rusty from a winder of little sex, how do you get back into the swing of things in a comfortable way?

Our Sexperts have compiled a list of the 5 must-do’s to get back into a sex routine!

  1. STRETCH!!! …Seriously though, stretch.
    Let’s face it, we all get a little lazier in the winter. With the cold weather promoting us to spend more time on our couches and the icy sidewalks convincing us to take the subway to work, our bodies can get a little stiff over the season. Whether you do an in-home yoga routine or you head to the gym to limber up, giving your body the chance to stretch is a big must before diving back into bed.
  2. Drink lots of water
    Hydration isn’t only great for your skin, but being properly hydrated gives your body better stamina, making it more likely that you’ll last longer in bed.  More…

The Blessing Is A Curse: Why Having A Big Dick Can Hinder You In Bed

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If you’re a frequent SexSeacher, there’s no doubt you’re already familiar with our newest addition to the SS team, Erika Jordan. Erika is one of the biggest know-it-all’s about sex in the best way possible. She’s experienced nearly everything in the sack, so she has intimate knowledge of almost any sex question you could have. That’s why we’ve brought her on to answer any and every question you have about love, lust, and everything that goes on in between.

This week we had a question from someone with a very large problem. To put it the most delicate way possible, he’s a little too well endowed and women have a hard time receiving what the good lord game him.

We know that most men without this problem would love to have it, but men who are effected by it generally whistle a different tune. While a slightly larger than normal penis is generally pleasurable in bed, a too-big penis can be extremely painful for someone who isn’t used to the size.

So what can you do if you go into a sexual situation knowing that your member might be a bit much to take?

  1. Have realistic expectations
    If this is the first time you and your lady are getting naked together, don’t expect intercourse. The human body is only designed to take so much, and if she hasn’t had the chance to adjust, then diving in isn’t really an option. Thinking that you’re in for a passionate night may leave you disappointed, so don’t go into it with high expectations.
  2. Have her do a little homework
    When you’re in school, you do homework so when the big test comes around you’re ready. That’s exactly what she’ll have to do here. Have her  physically prepare herself with the help of dildos and stretchers so you don’t injure her during the big moment.
  3. Be comfortable with oral sex
    Oral sex is a two way street.  If you’re not planning on giving her something that will leave her satisfied, don’t expect the same in return! Chances are until she’s prepared for your size you’ll be stuck in Blow Job City, which can very quickly become vacant if you’re not willing to give her the same! Go down on her as much as she goes down on you so you can continue to get your jollies off.
  4. Have patience!
    Some women’s bodies can adjust within a day, and some can take weeks. Whatever you do, don’t force the issue. You’ll have to trust her word on when she’s ready, otherwise you’ll run the risk of simply not getting laid at all.

Want to know Erika’s tips on dealing with a big dick? Check out her video on the subject under the cut! More…

Your Body Problems Aren’t As Weird As You Think: Our Experts Dish On Uneven Boobs And Curved Members

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Let’s face it, we all have issues about our bodies. Whether we think our hair is too thin our our bellies are too thick, everyone has issues about their bodies that they’d prefer to change– Especially when it comes to our private parts.

Cosmopolitan Magazine recently talked to Debra Wickman, MD, and Shannon Chaves, PsyD, about the most common body issues men and women have, and they quickly found out that those things we think are only wrong with us are actually wrong with a majority of people!

From uneven boobs to men producing a distinctly unpleasant scent from ‘down there,’ our Sexperts break down what Wickman and Chaves discussed so you can see that your abnormal issue is actually pretty normal after all.

UNEVEN BOOBS
This is the most common issue women face, but because most women aren’t willing to talk about it, females think it only effects them. The truth is, every woman in the world has uneven boobs. Every single one of them. The average breasts are quarter of a size different, but women can be up to two cup sizes in difference from the left to the right before doctors consider it an actual medical issue. It’s easy to let this effect your self confidence because we all want to look perfect while naked, but the sooner you realize it’s normal, the faster you can begin being comfortable in your own skin. But what can you do to conceal the issue on a day-to-day basis? Cutlets! You can purchase breast enhancers (that bare a striking resemblance to chicken cutlets) from nearly any lingerie store in the country. Simply wear one in the cup of your bra that’s lacking and voila! Instant evener.  More…

You Have A Better Chance Of Finding Sex After Valentine’s Day Then Before, New Study Shows

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We know that most single people were scrambling to find action before February 14th, but a new study shows that the smart people weren’t in a rush: People are more likely to find sex in the two weeks following Valentine’s Day than they are to find it on the days leading up to the holiday.

According to Pace University in New York City, nearly twice as many people in North America find new sexual partners between February 14th and 28th than one4s who do between February 1st and 14th.

“There’s an urgency for those looking for love before Valentine’s Day because of the emotional effects that come along with being alone. People who genuinely want to be in a relationship often feel overwhelmed at the thought of being alone on Valentine’s Day for fear that seeing others happy will amplify their sadness,” says Pace professor Karl MacIver. “But that’s not the case for those simply looking to have sex. People who are looking for a strictly physical relationship have a better chance of finding it post-February 14th. The emotional stigma that comes along with the time of year has worn off by this point, and many people who were looking for relationships begin to settle for the idea of sex.” More…