Ever since sexual context became the norm on prime-time television, we’ve been faced with the realization that the female preference in the bedroom is to have a guy who’s hung like a horse– But when it comes to penis size, is bigger actually better?

We should first start with what is considered ‘big’. Although most men would like to think they’re in the 8-9″ range, in actuality most men are closer to the 4.5-6″ range. That means good news for most men, since the shortcomings they thought they’ve been living with is actually what most men around them are sporting.

But the question still remains: Does a woman want to bed a man who is average, or one who is well endowed? According to a study done by Ask Men Magazine, a majority of women say they’d rather be with someone who had less length and knew what to do with it than they would be with someone who was large and caused them pain during intercourse.

If you’re on the shorter end of the stick (that was fully pun intended), here are three reasons why men with larger penises may have it worse when it comes to adventures in the bedroom:

Anal

Anal sex is like walking a tightrope: No matter how many times you do it, you have to be careful! The anus isn’t meant for sex, so it doesn’t produce natural lubricant like a vagina does, and it doesn’t stretch to accommodate the size of a penis. Most men with larger-than-average penises not only have a hard time having anal sex, but when they are successful at it, they often tear the sensitive skin surrounding the rectum, regardless of how much lube they use.

Oral

If you have an average size penis, chances are you’ve experienced the pleasure of having someone deep throat your member. Nothing feels quite as good as having someone take your entire erection in their mouth, right? Well imagine never experiencing that feeling again. The average depth of a mouth is three inches– Not exactly the make of something that could fit a 9″ penis in it.

Doggy style

In a survey done by the popular medical show The Doctors, it was found that doggy style is the most sexually stimulating position for men. The angle the penis is able to enter the vagina and the visual of having a backside pressing against you can turn a man on easier than foreplay does! But men who have large penises may never get to experience this– The opening of a vagina does stretch, but it’s not made of elastic. Doing it doggy style is dangerous, as it’s putting more pressure than usual on the part of the vagina that’s easiest to tare. And trust us– If you have a large penis, it’s going to tare.

Bigger can be better, but small can be just as good! Learn to work with what you have and you’re sure to be a bedroom success regardless of size.